Sunday, May 2, 2010

Retarded Politician of the Week: Charlie "Jesus" Crist

Looks like some of that "Messiah Dust" must have found its way onto Florida Governor Charlie Crist when he hugged Barack Obama. Now Senate candidate Chuckie thinks that he is so indispensible to the State of Florida that he can rise again from political death to electability as an independent. "Jesus" Crist has left the Republican Party and become an independent because Floridians, and all of America, need "Jesus" Crist in these trying times.

The heck with loyalty, the heck with fair play, the heck with losing like a man. These principles are reserved for mere mortals. "Jesus" Crist is a political prophet, nay a political "messiah" for the unwashed masses, here to rise above the Democratic and Republican parties and deliver Floridians and Americans from evil.

The truth is that "Jesus" Crist is politically clueless and misread the political winds. He reached out to Obama and supported the horrendous federal bailout, which did nothing for the man on the street. He backed the teachers' unions in Florida rather than parents and students. And he had no clue what the Tea Party movement was about and was bypassed by it. Unlike the real Jesus, Crist is out to save only one soul: his own political soul.

Hopefully the Republican, conservative, and libertarian voters of Florida will do what is fitting for "Jesus" Crist, and crucify him in the election by voting for Marco Rubio.

1 comment:

  1. Crist just does not get it. Let him crumble into political dust.